Is it possible to overcome limiting beliefs?
Limiting beliefs are just rules we make up for ourselves. They’re insidious and powerful. We don’t often speak them, but I’m willing to bet you have them, too.
Limiting beliefs are sneaky buggers, wiggling in unnoticed and unchallenged.
Rooting them out is difficult, but necessary work if we want to build a Slow Business that makes an impact in both our families and the world.
One of mine is : Joy doesn’t count.
If something comes easy, if it’s joyful, it doesn’t count.
So that business I’ve built part-time, in my slippers between loads of laundry while raising two little kids, the one sneaking up on six figures? The one that’s fuelled by customers who’ve become family? The one thats comes easy?
I didn’t do it on my own. There was no grand plan or goal setting. No mind-numbing commute or dread of Monday mornings. I didn’t grind or push or struggle to grow. There was no sobbing in my Starbucks on Robson Street in the middle of the workday.
The work is meaningful. And enjoyable.
Obviously, doesn’t count.
What counts is grind and sacrifice and late nights and doing it all on my own and contorting myself into roles that fit my true self about as well as my pre-baby jeans.
What if the thing we’re chasing is actually a mirage? What if we turned around to realize that that thing we want so badly, it’s right behind us, has been all along?
What if that boulder you’ve been pushing uphill is actually made of styrofoam? What if you don’t have to push it uphill at all? What if the true path to a big, brave, impactful life is to turn round and let it roll down the way you came?
If we want overcome our limiting beliefs, we have to be willing to question our assumptions.
We have to be willing to take a hard look at the things we believe to be true, especially the things that we KNOW are true, and be open to the possibility that actually, maybe – the truth is perfectly, annoyingly, the opposite.
It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you into trouble. It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so.
– Mark Twain
Why CAN’T work be joyful? Why do we only value work that is hard, difficult, a struggle? What’s wrong with finding ease and pleasure in how we spend our one wild and precious life?
Why do we fail to value the things that come easy to us – and therefor fail to value ourselves, set our prices low, question our worth?
Can you see how this one tiny, inconspicuous belief shoots us in the foot? Keeps us from playing big, chasing down our calling, leaving our mark on the world?
What would your work life look like if you decided, today, that joy counts?
Would you finally be able to walk in your calling? Would you charge what you’re worth? Would you – just by showing up in the world and savouring the joy and ease and pleasure of your work – give other women permission to do the same?
We don’t need a million self-help books, or spend a fortune on therapy to understand the root of our limiting beliefs (although therapy is great, if you can!) All we need to do is recognize our limiting belief and then – decide.
Decide to take action. Decide to ask of ourselves the braver, more beautiful questions. Decide to be open to the possibility that the things we know for sure, just ain’t so.
But most importantly – decide today that joy counts. Move mountains, singing as you go.